The Start of a New Beginning
by LindsayMesser
Summary: Not that good at summarys so just read to find out. ILoveDL you Rock!
1. Chapter 1

**Another one set after the mess that was the season 4 episode "Right Next Door". I love me some angst and drama, so enjoy!**

**I love portraying a strong Lindsay and an incredibly guilty Danny. : )**

**A DL Story**

**The Start of a New Beginning**

**Chapter 1-Learning the Truth & Making Decisions Lindsay's POV**

_**Prologue**_

I stood outside the building that would change my life forever, a single tear slid down my cheek, as I rested my trembling hands on my now slightly pronounced, small two month and four week, baby bump. Not quite believing it had come to this I made my way into the abortion clinic.

* * *

"I slept with Rikki" Danny said refusing to meet my hurt gaze.

I saw it coming, I knew deep down he'd been with another woman that's why he distanced himself from me, forgot my birthday, refused to spend any time with me outside work and hadn't reacted or said anything when I vented my feeling to him, telling him I loved him but I have to learn let it go; all I got was a sorry, we need to talk.

"So, what do you what me to do, congratulate you" I replied casually whilst making my way to sit down.

"No…I was kinda expectin` you to yell at me, slap me or at least throw things at me" Danny said as he came to sit next to me on my couch.

"What would be the point, I'd just damage my apartment and your face…at the end of the day whatever I say or do, isn't going to change the fact that you're a jerk, a complete asshole, that I hate you and that I hope you and Rikki burn in hell" I explained simply, giving him a satisfied smile before standing up and walking to the door and opening it.

"Now if you wouldn't mind leaving, before I change my mind…snap and you'll lose a vital part of your anatomy".

Danny stood up and walked to the door; he stopped and raised one hand to caress my face, tears forming in his eyes. He walked out and turned around, he opened his mouth to say something but I slammed the door shut.

I returned to the couch, contemplating my plan of action; you see I had just found out I was one month and three weeks pregnant with Danny's baby. I knew something was up when I called him, he was strangely short with me….she must have been there. "I slept with Rikki" those four words were replaying in my mind, that lying jackass implying he only slept with her once, like I believe that crap; they've probably been at it since Rikki stole his gun. I couldn't have his baby now, being a thirty-two year old, single, working mother wasn't exactly the situation I wanted to be in when I raised a child. I stood up and walked to the cupboard beside the television…I pulled out the yellow pages.

I found what I was looking for and began reading, trying to find the most suitable one, while stroking my non-existent baby bump. I suddenly stopped when I realised what I was doing and I pulled my hand away, _don't get to attached Lindsay, it will just make getting rid of it harder._ I thought to my self as I clambered up towards the phone, taking the yellow pages with me, I dialled the number and the ringing began.

"Hello, Elm Tree Family Planning and Abortion Clinic, Vivian, speaking how may I help you" a kind, warm woman's voice said over the phone.

"Hi, my names Lindsay Monroe" I said shakily. "I need an appointment, to have a, a…abortion" _God it killed me to say that._

"Ok, Miss Monroe, can I have your address and any contact numbers?" asked Vivian, kindly. I gave her my details and she gave me an appointment.

To be continued.......

(I`m not an expert....I`m only 15 so I have no idea how you go about getting a abortion, I kinda know what happens but I`m not 100% sure or accurate....this is strictly fiction and I hope I do not upset anybody with the issue of abortion)


	2. Chapter 2

**Lame Excuses & Finding Out**

I made my way into the lab; I was still thinking about my conversation with Vivian from the abortion clinic, that I had two weeks ago.

_Oh God I'll be almost three months pregnant, when I have the abortion…some women can feel the baby kick at three months. I can't abort my baby after feeling it… _

"Hey, there Kiddo you alright" it was Stella, she was the only person I had told about the baby, but not the only one that knew, Angell overheard us talking about it and Kendall had found out when she covered for me by looking through the evidence on a case; I had morning sickness and was throwing up in the bathroom. It was a "just girls" secret they had all been really supportive about my pregnancy; I don't know how they were going to take the "I'm having an abortion" announcement.

"Hi, look Stella I need to see Mac about something" I said quietly.

"Why are you ok, is it the baby, Oh God Lindsay what happened…tell me" babbled Stella quietly.

"Everything's fine…well sort of, I'll tell you later…I promise" I sighed as I turned and headed for Mac's office.

_**Knock, Knock**_

"Come in" Mac called.

I entered his office, "Mac I need to talk to you well…actually I need to tell you something" I said shakily.

"Sure, are you ok Lindsay, it's just you've seemed a little off lately, are you feeling better after the food poisoning you had" Mac asked.

The truth was I never had food poisoning; I just had to make up some lame excuse as to why I was throwing up. _Morning sickness my ass, I couldn't of been normal, noooo I had have my head stuck down the toilet for practically the whole day, thank God Mac took me of field work throughout my "food poisoning" _. It's the same excuse I told, Flack, Hawkes, Adam, Sid and even Danny.

"I have a doctor's appointment in a few hours and I thought I should give you the heads up, I'm going to have to finish my shift, an hour early" I explained.

"Sure, It's nothing serious I hope" I shook my head "I'll just need the date and I'll ask somebody to cover you, for the last hour" I told Mac the date and left his office, I headed for the break room and there I found Stella, Angell and Kendall all with the same emotions displayed on their faces….worry and concern.

I checked that it was just the four of us and then I shut the door.

"I have to tell you all something" I said "I, I, I'm having an abortion, I can't have his baby knowing what his done" I said confidently.

Stella, Angell and Kendall were also the only ones who new about my relationship with Danny and his screwing spree with Rikki.

I was expecting them to ask why I had decided to do this, instead they came over to me and we had a group hug. "We understand why you're doing this and will help you through it" said Angell sweetly hugging me tighter.

I turned my head slightly to see a confused and very tired looking Danny through the glass door, he looked at me and then my stomach, finally noticing the slight swell: _unfortunately for us Monroe women a bump appears almost instantly when you find out your pregnant_…his eyes widened, his jaw dropped and tears filled his eyes. _Oh God he knows I'm pregnant, how long had he been standing there, Oh God he knows I'm having an abortion and if I know Danny Messer he won't let me do it._

**Lame Excuses & Finding Out**

I made my way into the lab; I was still thinking about my conversation with Vivian from the abortion clinic, that I had two weeks ago.

_Oh God I'll be almost three months pregnant, when I have the abortion…some women can feel the baby kick at three months. I can't abort my baby after feeling it… _

"Hey, there Kiddo you alright" it was Stella, she was the only person I had told about the baby, but not the only one that knew, Angell overheard us talking about it and Kendall had found out when she covered for me by looking through the evidence on a case; I had morning sickness and was throwing up in the bathroom. It was a "just girls" secret they had all been really supportive about my pregnancy; I don't know how they were going to take the "I'm having an abortion" announcement.

"Hi, look Stella I need to see Mac about something" I said quietly.

"Why are you ok, is it the baby, Oh God Lindsay what happened…tell me" babbled Stella quietly.

"Everything's fine…well sort of, I'll tell you later…I promise" I sighed as I turned and headed for Mac's office.

_**Knock, Knock**_

"Come in" Mac called.

I entered his office, "Mac I need to talk to you well…actually I need to tell you something" I said shakily.

"Sure, are you ok Lindsay, it's just you've seemed a little off lately, are you feeling better after the food poisoning you had" Mac asked.

The truth was I never had food poisoning; I just had to make up some lame excuse as to why I was throwing up. _Morning sickness my ass, I couldn't of been normal, noooo I had have my head stuck down the toilet for practically the whole day, thank God Mac took me of field work throughout my "food poisoning" _. It's the same excuse I told, Flack, Hawkes, Adam, Sid and even Danny.

"I have a doctor's appointment in a few hours and I thought I should give you the heads up, I'm going to have to finish my shift, an hour early" I explained.

"Sure, It's nothing serious I hope" I shook my head "I'll just need the date and I'll ask somebody to cover you, for the last hour" I told Mac the date and left his office, I headed for the break room and there I found Stella, Angell and Kendall all with the same emotions displayed on their faces….worry and concern.

I checked that it was just the four of us and then I shut the door.

"I have to tell you all something" I said "I, I, I'm having an abortion, I can't have his baby knowing what his done" I said confidently.

Stella, Angell and Kendall were also the only ones who new about my relationship with Danny and his screwing spree with Rikki.

I was expecting them to ask why I had decided to do this, instead they came over to me and we had a group hug. "We understand why you're doing this and will help you through it" said Angell sweetly hugging me tighter.

I turned my head slightly to see a confused and very tired looking Danny through the glass door, he looked at me and then my stomach, finally noticing the slight swell: _unfortunately for us Monroe women a bump appears almost instantly when you find out your pregnant_…his eyes widened, his jaw dropped and tears filled his eyes. _Oh God he knows I'm pregnant, how long had he been standing there, Oh God he knows I'm having an abortion and if I know Danny Messer he won't let me do it._


	3. Chapter 3

**Avoiding Danny & Confrontation at the Clinic**

I had managed to avoid Danny, reasonably well for next few hours; once in a while I'd catch him staring at my slightly expanded stomach or my rapidly growing boobs. _I'm in the later stages of my second month and I already gone from a 32C to a 32DD, what the HELL is wrong with my body._

He won't have anything to stare at this time tomorrow; when I've aborted his baby. An hour before I had to leave for my "appointment" I unfortunately had to be in the office with Danny finishing off some case reports.

Danny gave a muffled cough and placed down his pen. He opened his mouth to speak to me for the first time in weeks.

"How are you" Danny asked softly, trying but failing to make eye contact with me.

"Fine…thanks" I replied not taking my eyes off the report I was currently reading.

"Whadda bout` the baby" he asked a slight quiver in his voice. "Were you ever gonna tell me, Linds".

I froze, stopped reading the report and adjusted my position, so I could look at him without my small bump being squashed by the desk.

"**My **baby is just fine, thank you" _I emphasised __**my**__ in the statement. _I noticed a hurt look in his eyes and tired my best to dodge it.

Danny stood up and approached me; he knelt down beside my chair "May I" he asked hopefully. I nodded. He moved his hands towards me and placed them on my slightly protruding stomach; due to his unexpected action for the first time since he had told me about his unfaithfulness….we connected, me, him and our child. Tears came to his eyes as he smiled up at me, his hands still placed upon my stomach….his child…our baby. I turned my head slightly and the clock on the wall caught my attention. _Oh crap, I should have left fifteen minutes ago. _I took a hold of Danny's hands and pulled them off my bump, I stood up suddenly, walked away from my desk and Danny and walked through the door; leaving him extremely confused.

I entered the locker room, opened my locker, pulled out my bag and slammed it shut. I was making my way down the hall towards the elevator, when a voice called my name.

"Lindsay" it was Danny.

"Lindsay, wait where ya goin`, please stop, Lindsay please" he was running after me as I approached the elevator and stepped in. I saw him still running towards me, calling me name as the doors of the elevator closed.

_**Danny's POV**_

_Where the hell is she goin`? _I thought to myself as I made my way towards the break room. I had just begun makin` myself a coffee when Stella and Kendall entered in deep conversation. I overheard the end of it…

"I hope Lindsay will be ok" Kendall said quietly to Stella. "Getting an abortion is something she shouldn't go through alone" _Abortion…abortion why the hell was she getting rid of my baby…our baby!!_

I forgot about the coffee and interrupted Stella and Kendall's conversation. "Lindsay's havin` an abortion, what…why, when…where" I asked panic spreadin` through my body.

"Danny, it's really not our place to say …" Stella begun.

"Please, please I can't let her kill our baby, please Stel, tell me where the clinic is" I asked frantically, tears filling my eyes.

_**End of Danny's POV **_

I stood outside the building that would change my life forever, a single tear slid down my cheek, as I rested my trembling hands on my now slightly pronounced, small two month and four week, baby bump. Not quite believing it had come to this I made my way into the abortion clinic.

I took a deep breath as I approached the desk at reception.

"Hi, I'm Lindsay Monroe, I have an appointment at five thirty" I explained to the blonde lady behind the desk.

She checked for my appointment on the computer and nodded. "Ok then Miss Monroe, if you would like to take a seat and wait for the doctor to call you in" she said kindly. I nodded and made my way to an empty seat next to a young red-headed woman.

"Hi, I'm Hannah" the young red-headed woman said.

"Lindsay" I replied.

"What you here for" she asked softly.

"Abortion" I hesitated slightly not sure of her reaction.

"Yeah me too" she said glumly "Hardest decision I've ever had to make".

"Yeah it was hard for me too" I said sadly.

_**Fifteen Minutes Later**_

"Lindsay Monroe" said a pretty African-American doctor. "We're ready for you, if you'd like to follow me" she said sweetly. I looked at Hannah and smiled, before getting up and following the doctor through the door.

Ten minutes later I found myself lying in a dentist type chair come bed, only in a hospital gown and my underwear in a clinical white room (**This was just a guess I have no idea about theprocedureof abortion)**

I had discovered that the pretty African-American doctor was Dr Leila Roberts the doctor doing my abortion; it was just me, her and a nurse.

_**Danny's POV**_

"You don't seem to understand do you" I had been standin` at the reception for ten minutes, tryin` to get through to stop Lindsay from aborting our baby, but this blonde cow behind the desk was refusin` to let me go through.

"I'm sorry Sir, but you can't go in procedures are taking place" she said irritably.

_Ah screw it._ I unclipped my badge and thrust into the woman's face. "Now I'm gonna ask you one more time, tell me which room Lindsay Monroe's in NOW" I stated impatiently.

"Room four" she said finally giving in.

"Thank you, that wasn't so hard now, was it" I snapped. I walked towards the door and pushed the door open; as I searched for room four, I clipped my badge back into place.

_**Back in Lindsay's POV**_

"LINDSAY, LINDSAY" _Oh God it can't be him not here, not now._

"Wait" I said to Dr Roberts. "I, I have to sort my ex, I'll be back in a minute" She nodded as I pulled myself of the bed, stood up and made my way to the door.

"Danny, Danny what the hell are you doing here" I said quietly walking up behind him pulling on his jacket.

He turned around.

"Lindsay oh thank God I found you, that cow at reception wouldn't let me through so I hadda show her my badge, then I couldn't find room four, I mean why aren't the rooms in order….Oh God please tell me you haven't done it yet, please tell me you haven't" tears came to his eyes as he finished his rambling.

"Danny why are you here, you have no right to be here" I said quietly.

"I'm here to stop you makin` the biggest mistake of you life, Montana" he explained lifting one hand to caress my face and placing his other hand on my bump.

"You haven't called me Montana since before Reuben died" I said sadly staring up into his aqua eyes as he stared down into my chocolate ones.

I pulled away from him and began walking back to the room, as I was about to walk through the door he called me.

"Lindsay, please you can't do this, I know you hate me but don't take it out on our child, please Montana" he begged tears falling down his face.

"I have to do this Danny, I'm sorry, I, I can't have this baby…your baby" I said confidently.

"Lindsay, please don't kill our baby, you at least owe me that" Danny cried.

_I owe him, what the hell!_ I strode over to him and did what I should have done when I found out he'd been having sex with that woman Rikki. I lifted my right hand and slapped him…I slapped him hard.

"I owe you nothing…how dare you, tell me what I can and can't do, I `m having this abortion whether you like it or not…it's not your decision to make, it's my body, you lying, cheating jerk" I spat venomously towards a shocked, watery eyed Danny who now sported a bright red slap mark on his right cheek.

I turned and made my way back to room four, leaving Danny with a very sore, cheek.

"Lindsay…please…the baby…I'm so sorry….I….love you" sobbed Danny.

I turned around for the last time "STOP lying to me…you don't love me, you never have and you never will, if you did you wouldn't have lied to me when I rang you up and when that conversation ended you should have told Rikki to leave, that it was a mistake…. noooo you decided to do her again and then you had the nerve to have an attitude with me and treat me like crap, when you arrived at work late after another round with that, that women and all you said was sorry, we should talk. You know what you want a baby so much, then go do Rikki a few more times and if you're lucky YOU`LL KNOCK HER UP!" I finished my speech and walked back into the room.

"I'm so sorry about that, my ex and I were just having a little domestic, good thing I'm your last appointment huh" I said lightly. "So shall we continue? "

As I lent back preparing for the abortion, tears sprang to my eyes as I heard Danny uncontrollably crying on the other side of the door.

**To BeContinued........**


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4-Changing my Mind & Bonding over the Baby**

I couldn't do it. I couldn't have the abortion, even after everything that man's done to me I let him get to me because of the things he said, I changed my mind and I couldn't destroy the life we made together…our baby.

I was making my way to Danny's apartment, the doors of the elevator opened and I walked through. I made my way to his front door, hands placed firmly upon my baby bump; I took one hand off and reached to knock on the door.

_**Knock…Knock, Knock**_

I heard footsteps coming towards the door and prepared myself for Danny's reaction, the door swung open….it wasn't Danny.

* * *

"Rikki" I said shocked. "What are you doing here, where's Danny"

"Rikki, who's at the door" Danny's voice called from the bedroom.

He walked out of the bedroom, clad in jeans and a white wife beater and froze; when he noticed my presents in the doorway.

I looked from Danny to Rikki and from Rikki to Danny, after adding up to a devastating conclusion; I turned on my heels and began speed walking my way back to the elevator.

"LINDSAY, WAIT COME BACK ITS NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE" yelled Danny as he began for the second time today running after me, only this time he was quicker.

Rikki followed him but headed for her apartment instead of me.

Just as I was about to enter the elevator, he grabbed my arm and pulled me against his chest, he placed his fingers under my chin and forced me to look up at him.

I ripped my head from his grasp and then looked at him dead in the eyes, hate boiling up inside me.

"Why was she there Danny, in your apartment…what you couldn't get enough of her you decided to go back for more…I came here to give you a second chance you jerk…I don't know why I bother, you'll never change…my mother warned me about you city boys, to bad I let you knock me up before I realised she was right" I spat at him angrily at him. I tried pulling away but his grip was too strong "Oh and another thing my mother used to say once a cheater always a cheater, you…scumbag" tears began trailing down my face.

"Linds, I know Rikki bein` in my apartment is misleadin`, especially after what we did but she was just sayin` goodbye, she's gonna go stay with her parents for a while" he said softly. "She just wanted to tie up any loose ends or any unresolved issues between us, so when she does return it won't be awkward, that's all baby…I promise you".

He looked deeply into my watery gaze and placed his hands on my still existent bump.

"You didn't do it…did you" he said hopefully.

I shook my head and replied "I changed my mind"

He smiled as tears of happiness began falling down his tired face. He leaned down slightly and kissed my forehead, nose, cheeks, chin, neck and eyelids. I started giggling, when he knelt down in front of me and began placing soft kisses on my stomach. He stood up, took my hand and led me back to his apartment.

_**Half an Hour Later**_

"I can't believe you brought a new bed" I said to Danny.

"I wanted you to be the only woman I'd ever have in my bed, Montana" he replied.

We were both lying in Danny's "new bed" I was lying on my side, my face cuddled against Danny's broad chest; one of his strong arms wrapped firmly around my body the other slipped between our bodies, his hand gently rubbing my small bump…our baby.

"I know it's gonna be a while until you can fully trust or forgive me…but I need you to know that what happened between me and Rikki meant nothin`, all that matters to me is you and our baby" he explained tears filling his eyes, a few trailing down his face.

I wiped away his tears and kissed his chest, he smiled down at me his eyes still glazed over with tears.

"I can't believe I almost lost this….I can't believe I almost lost you…both of you" he sobbed.

I looked up into his crystal blue eyes as he stared down into my warm brown ones; I adjusted my position so that I was level with him. I kissed him softly on the lips and then pulled away, he pulled me closer to him and kissed me gently it soon became more passionate as he pulled my maternal body on top of his muscular one.

* * *

A little while later I lay on his bed drifting in and out of sleep as Danny head lay on my chest his hand stroking our baby through one of his Giant's jerseys. As I closed my eyes soothed by Danny's loving actions, I heard him speak:

"Daddy, loves you baby…now I know I hurt Mommy but I'm gonna spend the rest of my life if that's what it takes to make it up to her…cause` I love her so much, she's my world, my everythin`. Daddy loves you and mommy like crazy" he finished and placed several butterfly kisses on my slightly expanded stomach

Before resting his head back on my chest and settling into sleep.

**The End**

So Sequel ???? Let me know.


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